And every time that happens a bunch of apologists appear shouting "Why didn't they inform the site operators first? That is really irresponsible"
And then some poor teen believes it and thinks "maybe it's wise to inform the site first" and subsequently goes to jail for doing the 'responsible' thing. And so the cycle continues.
Wouldn't combining the two tactics be the actually responsible thing to do? Inform the operators anonymously, and tell them that in four weeks a copy of this e-mail will be publicized.
You definitely have to phrase it kindly and explicit and be open for other options of how to proceed. Otherwise, the point of staying anonymous is to protect oneself from unnecessarily enraged admins or other responsible people.
And then some poor teen believes it and thinks "maybe it's wise to inform the site first" and subsequently goes to jail for doing the 'responsible' thing. And so the cycle continues.